I first heard about this whilst listening to the radio in my car. Two presenters, one male and one female were discussing the story which appears in the Mail Online. The female presenter said that she’d not be offended if she were addressed as ‘love, ‘darling’ or ‘babe’.
This followed a notice put up in the offices of Brighton & Hove buses saying ” ‘Please can drivers be aware that some of our customers may take offence at at having terms such as “love”, “darling” and “babe” directed towards them’. ‘This can be seen by some as by some as being a sexist comment, as a recent complaint has highlighted’. Calling someone ‘love’, ‘darling’, ‘babe’ etc is not my thing but is it really so wrong? It seems to me that the manner in which something is said carries almost more weight than the actual word/s used. Although I wouldn’t address a passenger in these terms I’ve heard other drivers do so in a cheerful, jocular, warm, genuine manner. Bus drivers are often criticised for being monosyllabic to the point of rudeness, now they’re being criticised for being cheerful and human to their passengers.
I say I wouldn’t use those words to a passenger but many times a passenger, often elderly, has called me ‘dear’ or ‘love’. I take no offence whatsoever at being addressed this way.
rc169 // Feb 6, 2012 at 20:00
“It seems to me that the manner in which something is said carries almost more weight than the actual word/s used. ”
Absolutely. Why can’t people just take things in the spirit in which they are intended?
I also agree that it seems to have been a management failure to issue an instruction without thoroughly investigating the complaint. Surely the operator should have asked the complainant for specific instances, which could then have been investigated with the aid of the CCTV film which would have shown whether the driver was being rude or friendly? That would presumably have happened with any other complaint, so why not this one?
dave trident // Feb 5, 2012 at 16:51
This is typical of the weak management we have to put up with at brighton & hove. Is it acceptable to call a passenger ‘love’ or isn’t it? Which twerp in management was paid to produce this rubbish?
jeff // Feb 4, 2012 at 15:51
I agree with Malcolm we are “dambed if we do & dambed if we dont” be cheerful. It’s part of the job to try to judge the passenger & reply in an appropriate manner. This was hardly a sexist comment, just the driver being himself.
Dennis Dash // Feb 1, 2012 at 19:30
I must admit that when you’ve done a busy trip into a terminal such as Guildford or Fareham, saying thank you to nearly every passenger makes you sound like a robot so I do vary my acknowledgement to Ta, Cheers, Thanks very much, See you soon or whatever seems suited to the passenger concerned. I have used thank you gorgeous when I want to see what reaction I will get !!!
Like Malcolm I don’t generally see it as offensive, but it helps if you can judge from the mood and demeanour of the passenger whether it’s appropriate.